Kick up the Dust

I stepped outside my usual routine and hit up the Spoke tonight for the Derailers. It's one of my favorite places to watch people and tonight was no exception. Crammed to the gills, wandering eyes continuously scanned the crowd seeking 3 minutes of companionship. Stay off the dance hall floor if you're there to chat because these people mean business. Believe me and my beer soaked shirt sleeve, there's no room out there for casual conversation. Too bad my amazing dance partner was m.i.a. tonight. She always makes me look good out on the dance floor. -j-

Night at the Market

It was a beautiful Friday night in Austin to soak in the ambiance. Free flow Jazz organ and the aromas of various smoked meat hung in the crisp air. Armed with a fresh sketchpad, my arsenal of pens, good conversation, and a Dale's, there was never a better night to sit and enjoy the moment. Cheers. -j-

Review: Vincent Moon and Lulacruza – Esperando el Tsunami

In a modern world where impatience, mass trends and uniformity seemingly reign supreme, sometimes we, as a collective international community, forget to slow down and observe the very things that make us human, as unique individuals or as collective cultures. In the latest film Esperando el Tsunami (or visual album, as the group dubbed it), by French filmmaker Vincent Moon (of La Blogotheque fame) in collaboration with Columbian/Argentinian musicians Lulacruza, the trio examined in detail the diversity and strength of community through music (and sound in general) in its wide array of indigenous forms over a period of a month and a half through various spontaneous adventures in Columbia. Cultural extinction is a wide spread phenomenon in the increasingly modern world via a variety of means including food source elimination in particular. Moon and Lulacruza capture the very essence of the vanishing Columbian culture and natural environment on film which in many ways seeks to educate the international public to harbor, protect, or at a minimum, just highlight the people and places the camera captured, even if only for a fleeting moment.

As mentioned above, this “visual album” bridges the gap between music, film, and spoken-word in a fluid, infectious statement. Field recordings in collaboration with local folk music makers highlighted the spontaneous nature and strength of music to bring people together towards a common interest including healing, religious rites, and joyous celebration. Overall, the film is about communication in its various forms and the beauty, diversity, and uniqueness of each style and its relationship to its region and the people which inhabit its ecosystem. The group noted that, “Columbia is the country with the most flora and fauna species by square km in the world.” Considering the lush and diverse environment, it’s not surprising to find just as wide an array of rich musical and cultural styles as we travel along with the band.

Criscrossing around the country, from the mountains, desert, and the sea, Lulacruza developed soothing and invigorating musical journey in collaboration with the locals as Moon highlighted the essence of each place in detail; the ever patient ‘Man with the Motion Picture Camera’. Those unfamiliar with Lulacruza’s musical style should be well initiated through the film within the first few moments, as Alejandra Ortiz’s spellbinding chanting and singing paired with natural noise-makers, electronic or formal percussive elements via Luis Maurette create an all-encompassing control over the viewer. In addition to this, Moon and his sound team incorporated a wide-array of natural soundscapes to aid the depth of auditory field and highlight the given place’s mood and soul.

In addition to the inspirational overall objective of the film, the release itself follows up on the ground-breaking marketing style as first debuted on Moon’s last film, An Island featuring Efterklang in 2011. The film is available to anyone in the world willing to open their homes or spaces to screen the film in what the director coined Public/Private Screenings. (You can find out more about the screenings here, including how to hold or attend one.) This project in particular gained strength through a Kickstarter fund, which allowed supporters a wide array of benefits in return for donations which provide d the group with travel and equipment funds. Considering the widespread interest in indie film and music in an international objective, the project was, not surprisingly, heavily supported through donations.

As for the film itself, Moon’s eclectic visual prowess, methodical timing, and patience are often the substance of the film, while these visual albums more or less are deprived of a true narrative or formal plot. More so often we are held in flux as a viewer in the back seat of the journey with no idea of our next adventure. The slow, brooding style asking the viewer to slow down in order to travel along is certainly a risk; though the tone of the film requests our acceptance and presence in the moment and respect for the subject matter. Visually speaking, the scenery and cinematography are striking and beautiful and we would expect of one of the Earth’s most vibrant ecosystems. Moon’s ability to use color and light sparingly as a highlight whether as a contrasting bird in nature or a bracelet on a child in an urban setting and capturing the simplistic elements of place are certainly well executed and add visual depth and interest. Asking for forgiveness, welcoming, and acceptance, Lulacruza’s obvious deep connection to the earth is touching and inspiring.

“There in the most profound darkness is where light grows and shines strongest”

As we see in the film, sometime the only way we can find out who we truly are as individuals is to listen to the place that surrounds us, gives us life, and feeds our energy. Opening our hearts to the world around us and patiently listening is the only way to absorb it. In the end, we must realize that we are all connected to this place we call home. The overarching theme of the film focuses strongly on respect: respect for the Earth, respect for culture, respect for musical diversity, and the respect for silence. If this film achieves one thing, it forces the viewer to slow down, breathe deeply, and truly pondered the place they call home. Listen to the sound of the earth, let it grasp you, and teach you its story.

Esperando el Tsunami - 3rd Teaser

Review: Liam Finn - FOMO

Getting out of the shadow cast by a famous father is a difficult feat. Just ask Julian Lennon or Jakob Dylan. In not quite the same extent, Kiwi Liam Finn feels their pain. Finn’s father, Neil, the widely respected and renowned musician from Crowded House, luckily has spread his musical genes on down the line. In cases like these, it’s uniqueness that divides the father/son relationship. There will always be members of the media that dwell on that fact, raising never ending comparisons. What Liam brings to the table for his sophomore release, FOMO, is pure unbridled musical creativity spanning genres as well as blood lines. Now, enough talk about fathers and legacies. Liam is trying to build his own, and he’s certainly on the right track where we find him at the moment.

The whiskers on Finn’s face scream folk, but on FOMO, there’s none to be seen. What we get is a mixture of the purest pop, solid psych guitar riffs (as always), and a little R&B thrown in for good measure. Compared to his debut I’ll Be Lightning, there is certainly much less aggression and more bubbliness, with the exception of ‘The Struggle’. The vibes could almost be opposites on the spectrum between lead single ‘Cold Feet’ and ‘Lead Balloon’. However, the psych influence is still placed at the base of FOMO’s pyramid, seen especially on ‘Chase the Seasons’.

Finn starts us off slow with a buildup of heavy feedback and his divine vocals on ‘Neurotic World’. Inclusions of piano and synth layer into a much more complete sound than were used to from Finn in the studio and certainly in the live setting, where he’s known for his raucous performances. ‘Don’t Even Know Your Name’ picks things up where I’ll Be Lightning left off, exhibiting the slow crescendos of vocal and guitar work with a steady beat churning the number along like a runaway train before busting through the station about a minute and a half in. The vibe gets smooth on ‘Real Late’ with Finn channeling his best inner Marvin Gaye. It’s by far the sexiest track on the album and unsurprisingly is a fantastic track to play as the night winds down.

It seems that for this release, Finn channeled all of his aggression into ‘The Struggle’, and in the overall scheme, it works well placed sixth as a palate cleanser of sorts. Otherwise, we find almost too much pop and not enough substance. Always one to end with a barn burner, rock anthem ‘Jump Your Bones’ finishes off the album with heavy feedback and a theme that even the most unaware of people could pinpoint. This is surely the track that audiences will find the live power prowess that they’ve come to expect in Finn’s live performances.

Overall, FOMO is fantastic from front to back and is certainly a grower. Every time you go back, there’s something else pulling at you that was missed in previous listens.

Review: Blind Pilot - We Are the Tide

Finding an ever-present spot on the list of premier indie folk cities in the country is Portland, OR, with it’s country and folk roots, laid-back vibe, and organic character. The latest release from Portland natives, Blind Pilot, ‘We Are the Tide’, is quintessentially northwest, reeking of lush forests soaked in a summer rain as the sun emerges from the cloud coverage. It begins with the kind of rain that allows you to be meditative, creative, and above all, hopeful. Like watching the water drops on a window pane and connecting the dots as they ebb and flow. Later on, when the sun finally appears, life returns to the forest.

The young duo of Israell Nebeker and Ryan Dobrowski gathered their musical and lyrical strengths as evidenced on the critically acclaimed debut, 3 Rounds and a Sound. For their latest release, We Are the Tide (released September 13th via Expunged) the duo took their sound to a more mature nature once again with the help of a long list of their talented friends. Here’s a group coming to grips with their sound and along with that, the arrangements feel more confident, surefooted, and optimistic.

On the opener, ‘Half Moon’, Nebecker’s vocal strength’s are remarkably solidified. The polished sound allows for more consistency in the whole release, working towards a stronger unified theme. ‘Keep You Right’, the first single on the album, is a pleasant meditation on a one sided relationship. The wonderful dichotomy of banjo and piano ballads, push the song along with harmonies and a harmonium following along to wrap it all together in a wonderful little package. The title track on the album, ‘We Are the Tide’, is much more playful in nature with an upbeat rhythm with Nebecker and company providing the vocal punch which has become the obvious trademark of the young group. This strength again is seen on ‘The Colored Night’ which is one the most complete tracks on the album, contrasts and changing styles all fluidly working together. The final track on the release, ‘New York’ utilizes the harmonium once again, providing a vacillant soundscape paired with desolate vocals with intermittent crescendos like crashing waves.

Since its release, We Are the Tide, is an album I have been consistently turning back to when I need a boost. The lows are not too low, yet the highs are not too high. It’s the perfect level of enthusiasm while still remaining slightly reserved. I think that in itself is a perfect philosophy for life. The fact that a release can affect the listener in such a manner is noteworthy in itself.

More than mowing lawns

I just stumbled upon this video created for the Landscape Institute and I feel that it beautifully reflects a wide array of the tasks performed by Landscape Architects.

When I often tell friends, colleagues in other fields, or strangers that I'm a Landscape Architect, there always seems to be some major misunderstanding of my profession, its intent, and the broad spectrum of tasks which we perform. There are many niches to the field, and some Landscape Architects do indeed design small scale residences. However, a majority of us are attempting to achieving something greater.

Have a look at the video to get a sense of the breadth of skills a Landscape Architect can bring to design table and how we are making the world around us better in countless ways.

Release Day! Efterklang - An Island Release Photos

It is release day for the project and you can now purchase the amazing set seen above. Check out the production value on Efterklang's DVD An Island! It's Sublime!

This was just shipped to me and I can't wait to see my name in the package. Those of us who participated in the Public/Private Screenings this past February will be listed in the liner notes! How cool to be a part of such a beautiful project!

From the site:
"The deluxe DVD version of An Island is limited to 5,000 custom-made, Eco-friendly, numbered, letterpress printed deluxe covers with a DVD disc full of bonus material and a 35 page booklet with photos and liner notes and anecdotes wrriten by the band."

The artwork was conceived by Hvass and Hannibal, photographer Antje Taige Jandrig and printed by Stumptown Printers in Oregon.

If that wasn't enough, if you purchase the DVD, you get a free electronic version of the film and audio and a live EP from the band's performance at the Roskilde Festival in 2010.

Be sure to support a great group of people by grabbing one of the 4,999 copies before they're all gone. My copy is already spoken for.

Here's an outtake of 'Modern Drift' which is included in the bonus material. How did this not make the final cut?! I wonder what other gems will be in there. Come on USPS!

FT5: Instruments

My latest piece for Austin Town Hall is now up and running on the site. In this installment of the Friday Top 5, I tackled the difficult task of ranking the most influential musical instruments ever. Check it out over at their site and leave me a comment here or over there if you agree or disagree with my choices.

Cheers!

Apparat - Ash/Black Veil

From Sascha Ring's (AKA Apparat) latest release, The Devil's Walk.

Review: The Head and the Heart @ ACL 9-16-11

Holy crap! September just flew by!! In the whirlwind somehow I neglected to post my review and sketches from the Head and the Heart at ACL. Doh! Well, better late than never, right?

And in the beginning, God said unto him, let there be three-part melodies. And then there was, and we heard them, and it was good. There upon the Austin City Limits stage for their maiden voyage, Seattle natives the Head and the Heart began the evening as the relatively unknown newcomer, but left as celebrated crowd favorites thanks in part to some genuine passion, honest and mature songwriting, and some well-timed technical flubs. You could almost sense the feeling of the audience precipitating the moment they could tell their friends about the great new band they should check out. Everyone loves that feeling, don't they?

Travelers old and young were lucky to be in attendance for an unforgettable, ecstatic and yet sometimes tear-wrenching musical journey of folk-rock soundscapes. Early on in the set a rare glitch in the sound system brought Terry Lickona down from his bejeweled, gold throne wielding the sincerest look of disapproval. “Cats and Dogs’ and ‘Coeur d’Alene’ were barely audible from the audience’s perspective, but according to Mr. Lickona, in the monitors they sounded great. Hands flew up in the air in reluctance and confusion from the sound booth and the show came to a screeching halt. This hiccup forced the young band to begin from the start of the set-list to murmurs unaware, but ultimately little disappointment from the crowd. Most seemed to consider it practice and once the sound was back in working order following a reboot, the real performance could begin. By then, most of the crowd was well versed in the antics of the group, which helped to solidify the positive response later on in the show. Call it dress-rehearsal for the audience, if you will. Those unfortunate souls who didn't know of the band prior to the evening, now were given a chance to hear the words of songs like ‘Ghosts' and opener 'Cats and Dogs' and could loudly sing along during the second take. It was obvious that this little incidental trick helped the support much more than it hurt the flow of the set. Through all the technical issues, other lesser composed groups might crack under the strain, but The Head and the Heart handled the evening like a wily veteran. The twitter response to the show proved that absolutely no one seemed to mind a few technical difficulties.

When it comes to relatively new musicians, the one trait to regard above all others is humility and sincerity. As the latest group to add to the extensive Austin City Limits archive, the group wielded three part harmonies and thumped out forlorn barn burners one after another which would have made Townes Van Zandt proud. The genuine nature of the performance was infectious, as smiles and dancing feet abounded on stage and in the audience. Here’s a band caught in a whirlwind of recent status, yet at the Moody, the fact that the stage upon which they now stood was a special moment, was not lost on the young performers. The self proclaimed motto of the band, who “live authentically in that crux, finding joy and beauty wedged there,” could not be more apt. The joy and beauty of a young group, finding it's voice is such a treat for anyone present to receive that message.

Highlights from the show involved nearly anything that involved Charity Rose Theilen from the audience's perspective, whose voice and beauty (apart from the promo picture; Come on Charity, just smile!) attracted quite the stir especially during 'Rivers and Roads'. Again noting the significance of the evening, the band pulled a Jimmy Rodgers number 'T for Texas' from the hat which was a welcomed change of pace from the set list mostly comprised of the band's self-titled debut. 'Ghosts' was another crowd favorite which was paired well with the poster design of the evening.

In the end, it was another day/another dollar at Austin City Limits, where the best in music, new and old, gather to expound on the wonders and trivialities of the world one performer at a time. Though the first season at the new venue is nearly complete, the growing modernized brand is continuing to be a household name across the country. The Head and the Heart's timely stop through the newly hallowed hallways was surely a notch on the belt for the band and established a freshness to the home for music on public television. We only have to wait to see what else they have in store next season, though it's certain to be good. For the Head and the Heart, without a doubt, a bright future awaits.

Below are a few sketches I did during the show.

New Tunes from Working for a Nuclear Free City

The Cinematic Orchestra New Scores

Wonderful news out of the UK, as The Cinematic Orchestra has just released two new singles which feature as scores to two short, silent films of the avant-garde variety. The first is Charles Sheeler and Paul Strand's Manhatta, from 1921.

The second is a Rene Clair's, Entr' acte from 1924, which features incredible imagery and camera tricks.

Review: Joanna Newsom @ ACL 8-1-11

Admittedly, walking up the long, marathon stairway to the Moody Theater on Monday night, I had little idea of the type of performance set to take place within its thick concrete walls. Being only casually briefed on the young songstress and her distinctive voice, I was weary, yet thoroughly optimistic. Somehow in recent years I had managed to miss the countless articles of praise and glorifying reviews. Usually, my taste leads me to musicians who boast a wide array of instrumental talent and song-writing skill, but somehow Ms. Newsom was never a blip on my radar. In some sense I blame myself for this lapse of reason, but where were my friends to help guide me towards the light? After the show, a wave of sadness mingled with joy washed over me. The joy from a newly minted favorite to add to a growing playlist rotation, surely. While the sadness, from wondering why it took me so long to find her in the first place?

In any event, the night began like any other taping with a short stop at Jo's for a burger and IPA at Gingerman. No surprises there. As my friend and I entered the venue however, our experience took an unexpected turn. First to our surprise, we were rewarded with seats which only enhanced the diminutive and hypnotizing rhythm of the evening. It would have been a danger to others no less as the stunning Ms. Newsom strutted out and near fainting, a collective swoon emitted from the Stage Right Mezzanine. Why did no one tell me how gorgeous she was?! Draped in a American Flag-esque gown, she quietly sat at her post contrasting the monolithic harp, so elegantly caressed like soothing a beast to sleep. The elegant and mousy figure boasts a powerful voice in a live setting which at once grabbed my attention and lead my mind along a mysterious path, frightening at times, yet I was pervasively unaware of any danger. Homer's Sirens is certainly an apt representation of her effect on me, as Newsom could certainly lead me to my death if she wished it so.

Unaware of much of her discography before I caught a glimpse of the evening's set list, several songs effected me more than others. Rarely have I seen a performer effect me enough to seek out lyrics post-show. I will willingfully say after that, Ms. Newsom is a poet first and a musician second.

Take Exhibit A, this verse from her first entry on the evening, 'Bridges and Balloons':

"The sight of bridges and balloons

Makes calm canaries irritable

And they caw and claw all afternoon

Catenaries and dirigibles"

Or Exhibit B from the final encore track, 'Baby Birch':

There is a blacksmith

And there is a shepherd

And there is a butcher boy

And there is a barber, who's cutting

And cutting away at my only joy

I saw a rabbit

As slick as a knife

And as pale as a candlestick

And I had thought it'd be harder to do

But I caught her, and skinned her quick

Held her there

Kicking and mewling

Upending, unspooling, unsung and blue

Told her "wherever you go

Little runaway bunny

I will find you"

And then she ran

As they're liable to do

Regardless of the meanings, I can honestly say there is no one else writing these kind of lyrics nowadays. The depth, the voice, and the subtle companionship of the harp combine into art in the purest sense of the word.

To think, there was a slight chance I would write off the opportunity to attend the show. What a terrible decision that would have been. Thankfully I listened to my gut and bore witness to one of the finest tapings I've had the opportunity to observe firsthand. I like to think that the new Moody Theater was designed with Ms. Newsom specifically in mind, because the theater's sound could not have sounded finer than last night. Every harp note to every clink of a beer bottle by her supporting cast was exquisite in clarity and richness. Kudos to the ACL staff for formally introducing me to Joanna Newsom and setting a formerly sky-high bar even higher. I didn't think it was possible, but have learned to never doubt the ACL team as they strive towards excellence and perfection. What else could anyone ask for? Besides dinner with Ms. Newsom, that is.

Below is the set list and a couple of sketches drawn during the set before adding a dash of color after scanning. If you made it this far, congrats on the superb attention span and thank you for reading!

TL;DR: Previously unbeknownst to me, Joanna Newsom is very talented and currently, she enjoys breaking my heart.

Warpaint, just add water

Photographs by Christopher Donez.

Another new video straight off the presses is the latest music video from LA quartet Warpaint. The girls created a dreamy underwater alter-universe contrasting with the grey and unstable world as we know it. The results from director Ted Newsome are great and fits the dreamy yet heavy tones of the music. Dive right in.

Explosions in the Sky - Last Known Surroundings

Fresh off the wire is the Austin post-rocker's first 'Official" music video for the song Last Known Surroundings, from their latest release Take Care,Take Care,Take Care. It's hard to believe that after 12 years, the group hadn't released a video. That ends today with a wonderfully colorful animated voyage through the natural and extraterrestrial world that perfectly matches the beauty and richness of the tune. Enjoy!

Review: Young Montana? - Limerence

Long is the laundry list of beat makers via the UK, but one of the rising stars of the scene, Jon Pritchard aka Young Montana?, is a ripe 20 years old. Following in the footsteps of renowned veterans such as Prefuse 73, FlyLo, and Madlib, Young Montana? has just released his debut album, Limerence on Alpha Pup, with some fantastic artwork to boot. Emerging from relative obscurity in Coventry, a smallish town in the UK, Pritchard has managed to bottle up some of the most fluid beats of the year with a strong down-tempo style perfected in his own backyard.

While the flow is intermittent at best, the release works as a host of independent sketches comprised of a multitude of ideas, much like Prefuse’s Apexian. The overall theme varies widely from the soulful to the askew to the more gathered bass-driven tracks, but when Pritchard hits the right chord, the sound is rich, interesting, and energetic. In many ways, Pritchard is on the forefront of the next wave of beat makers trying their hands at the game after years of study dominated by the masters. While Limerence is not entirely ground-breaking, the release more than makes up for it in sheer jam-ability, on tracks ‘Sacré Cool’, ‘Suchbeats’, and ‘Repetition’. While most vocals are reserved in snippets thrown in for an added texture, the release is more or less instrumental. Utilizing his full arsenal of techniques and tricks, nearly every track holds a recognizable pattern worthy of a head bob. ‘Legwrap’ however, is where Pritchard is certainly pushing the boundaries, incorporating the pinnacle of his off-kilter, wonky, and plain off the wall trips and ticks before emerging as one of the more killer beat structures found on the album. Such is the way Pritchard directs his listener, always keeping us wondering what may come next.

The final track ‘Connct’ once again thrives on the bass heavy, but throws in a Swan Lake music box riff to keep the listener always guessing. While it makes what begins as one of the most enjoyable tracks less so, it’s still interesting enough in its own right to justify a listen. For such a young mind at an essentially old man’s game at this point, I predict good things from Coventry and a multitude of small towns throughout the world in the years to come in the wide open world of beat-making. Whether this album becomes somewhat of a future masterpiece is yet to be seen, but there's no shortage of buzz behind the release to doubt this theory.

Review: Son Lux - We Are Rising

Son Lux (AKA Ryan Lott) is still relatively unknown despite a strong underground following and well-established name in the music theatre production circle. Even his stops through SXSW in 2008 and 2010 were less than minor blips on most blogger’s radars. However, after a solid debut in At Wars With Walls and Mazes via Anticon in 2009, Lott is front and center in the outsider music world. That stunning, yet polarizing debut consisted of randomized yet painstakingly set, modern classical arrangements and chopped hip-hop blended into a striking pattern of delightful vocal imagery.

After taking note of that record, NPR decided to up the ante and proposed a pseudo-dare. Could Lott, whose prior methods of creation consisted of long, drawn-out thought processes, complete his follow-up in 1 month (February no less)? Surely, you jest. Like most musicians, Lott scoffed at the thought of modifying his creative process so blatantly. Especially considering his new material was already taking a general form. By listening to his gut, Lott tossed that work aside and stepped up to the plate and hit a home-run. The finished product in the NPR RPM challenge, We Are Rising is a subtle wave at the meticulousness of his prior release, but with a strong foothold in the spontaneous and improvised.

What emerged is a record that takes the listener on a ride traveling multiple directions and varying speeds. ‘Flickers’ begins the voyage by the literal and metaphoric lighting of the candle. It’s the first glimpse of the light and dark, contrasts used intermittently throughout to great effect. The pseudo-title track ‘Rising’ is a powerful modern classical piece with pounding rhythms and playful winds. This dichotomy of contrasts is viewed has become more or less a signature of the young songwriter. What has also remained is a wonderful way with words, as seen on ‘Leave the Riches’. Toying with the idea of attachment, ‘Claws’ is a turn back to the slower drive, employing a rich bass heavy soundtrack contrasting with Lott’s airy vocals, while ‘Let Go’ is a direct shout out to his debut in the same vein as ‘Stand’ in tone and structure.

When an artist fully emerges themselves in a project and produces at a rapid pace, the result are often striking, if not unrecognizable. Such is the case here. The creativity that flowed in this month long session shows a deep rooted discipline, passion, and mental fortitude, not seen today in many artists. I find that refreshing, especially from such a relatively new artist. Son Lux took the best of his creative process and composed what many will argue is the best album of the year.

Street Joy

Local boys, White Denim, give a nod to the awkward and sweaty nature of the good ol' High School Prom in their latest video from 'D', which is now in stores. I, for one, certainly don't miss those days.

Vigilante Gardener

Taking to the man!

Amon Tobin ISAM Live

'Where's Waldo' anyone? Believe it or not, there's a DJ in this shot.

Brazilian electronic artist Amon Tobin has created something truly spectacular for the new tour of his mind-blowing album ISAM. The set design, seen in the extended trailer, is a pure spectacle, using pixel art and projectors on a cubist's dream canvas. Combined with his other-wordly music, the design is sure to take viewers on a wild ride throughout Europe. You really have to see this to believe it; and I still can't believe it.